The Ballyfermot Blogger

In 2003 Rody Molloy as the “state agency’s director-general” declared that honesty, integrity and public accountability were the “three core values” for his reign in FAS. As Rody wasn’t available for comment today we pulled the closest to the original off the streets to defend his case, so meet Ms Molly Roddy to counteract these allegations found in these online news articles in The Press Association and The Times Online.

 ”Molly how can you justify the expenditure of €643,000 over four years on transatlantic travel, as well as clocking up lavish expenses on beauty care, golf and dinners?”

Molly  “Well he does say that in The Press Association artice that ‘flights were wrong’ so this means that if God meant us to fly then he have given us wings at zero cost to the tax payer”
Molly ”As for beauty care, sure doesn’t his friend Mary and spouse need theses little luxuries and they give the tips out of their own pocket to be sure, think of it as a face lift for the country’s healthy image”
Molly  “…and golf and dinners in fancy places and high class restaurants placed on the executive credit card? sure it was just the convenience of having it to hand at the time and his eyes were closed during the transaction but as Homer Simpson says ‘If I can’t see it, it’s not illegal’ ”
Molly “Thank god you not asking about the ‘cough’ pay for view movies on the bloody card too, I couldn’t tell you a single actors name or film title but I’m sure they were worth watching and paying for, yeah dam good and for ‘chicken feed’ prices too”

“So Molly what about the Fas NASA study Scheme that costs us €1.5 million?”

Molly: “only Fine Gael would say that ‘It is outrageous that FAS would spend virtually the entire budget on advertising and promotion.’ Sure what have they every done for this country, eh? And we only spent €804,533 out of €866,629 — 93% of it in 2005 on  advertising and PR, which means basically that the right amount of officials were flown to Florida to make sure the students were studying and if they weren’t we’d launch them into space, besides the rest a huge 7% was spent entirely on the students”

“Well Molly what is FAS doing with the €1 billion per year budget?”

Molly: “We’re managing it, we’re spending it in the best way we can and that’s always been 100% on the Public and sure aren’t we all technically part of the public anyway”